color and sound.

I don't understand what is going on. I feel as though the world just does not understand. if the world all thought like me, we could change this place. I have to get out of here. I can't explain it. How great my music sounds, how amazing my food is, how fun things are to do. Even thinking is fun. NOBODY THINKS LIKE ME. If everyone thought like this, switched to my medicine,  we could create such a better world. But there aren't people like me. There are just people who want to consume, to compete, to discriminate..Why can't everything just be different? I don't understand people at all. 

I have never had a real relationship with any human. Friendship, relationship or just being close to a family member. There is just no one that i can ever connect to. EVERYONE IS IN A DREAM AND WON'T WAKE UP. They want to be someone they don't really want to be, someone they think they have to be. 

No one understands the human i have become. The way i live my life is so different that it frustrates me to be with other people. I can't go out and do something with someone unless i am in control. If it gets to the point where i can't be around those people i have to be able to leave. There are some people i don't just not talk to, but i avoid. Some people are so far away from my reality that i can't stand even hearing their voice. It makes me sad. Everything that comes out just doesn't have any substance or feeling. I feel as if it's fake words. Just words from a language.

PEOPLE ARE EMPTY INSIDE. Chemicals cause this..coke, e, pills, fast food, sugar free gum, diet soda, all will empty a person, but also people just don't understand what the world is about. They grow up not questioning, not knowing, didn't discuss things of purpose, learn from things, grow as humans, expand their life by not fearing death and seeing into other worlds. I spoke and heard my mind on those days. Those days changed me as i awoke from that dream. I saw what the world was and the beauty of color and sound. 

I feel so unlucky that i am in this generation of people. There has to be something else. something that is going to happen that will change the minds. My mind is way more complex than i would like it to be right now, seriously. WHERE IS MY OLD ROBOT SELF? The one who did what the robots told him to do. where is simple, innocent, naive robot self? I look in the mirror, hair gone now, but i don't see that robot. I never see a robot. where is the robot? The one who new nothing, and lived in a dream.